The other day, my new friend and co-worker (and the Future Mrs. Larry Mullen, Jr.) offered me a portion of her leftover lunch. It was an example of Middle Eastern cuisine-that is to say, it was a pile of mashed up stuff to be eaten with flatbread. As your friend and Cobra, I am always on the lookout for yummy foreign delicacies to share with you. I pressed Mrs. Mullen (may as well get used to calling her that now) for the recipe, and she selflessly agreed to share. I myself plan to make an enormous batch for Thanksgiving, then settle in to watch every inning of all the football matches. Does anybody know if the Native Americans are playing? --ed.

To make mouth-watering Hummus (pronounced "hummus") the Amy way, start with a clean, empty medium-sized bowl. Pour dry hummus mix into bowl and throw away or recycle the cardboard box.

Then dig through the garbage or recycling container to retrieve said hummus box to see amounts of other ingredients necessary. Add roughly the amount of required water and stir in clockwise direction only. Stirring counter-clockwise (or "anti-clockwise" for our British friends [you know who you are-ed.]) will ruin it, I'm pretty sure. I haven't tried it and don't know anyone who has, but my cousin once knew a guy.)

Find box again to see how much oil is required and add twice as much. Stir but leave some oil unstirred.

Set microwave for 3 minutes but take it out after about 25 seconds. Add tomatoes and maybe some more oil. Grab some pita bread, a kitchen towel and take everything down to a carpeted floor and eat 'til you're sick of it.

Martha Stewart, watch your ass. Have a Happy Thanksgiving. (From Vol. 24)